Saturday, April 12, 2008

nothing.

my relationship w/ running has returned to its pre-injury status, and i'm grateful. it seems that jamie and i were both put out of commission for the same length of time, and guillermo went on vacation and decided to use his brain more than his legs ... so we are all in the same place, again, although, i think i'm the least fit [don't tell the boys.].

st. louis was surreal. i'm not sure i will explain that. i will say that all the kates, i think, gave really stellar and interesting readings. i was really into all of them, and not a single word / line / tone sent my attention elsewhere, which is something because, there were 8 [well, i sat for seven]. i could even hear the poets before me, which is usually hard because i'm nervous.

and, after the reading, i stayed in st louis all weekend w/ my best friend from junior high. 

that was so fun and great and we got into the same sort of mishaps we would get into back in the day. 

but i was reminded of myself as a 12 year old which, honestly, i'm not as mean nor as insecure, but, i'm not that different either. i was reading my 8th grade journal and damn.... every day i wanted to die, or i was going to be killed, or my grades sucked, or my boyfriend was a jerk, or i  hated my best friend. or loved her too much. i'm pretty sure i was a lesbian in junior high, but i had no idea what a lesbian was, so i was just miserable.... and very unsure of the people around me. when my best friend moved away when we were 14 or 15.... i was so devastated, and i cried for days and days... because she was the only one who understood me.


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see, this is an example of a post that has words but doesn't really say anything.

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